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Three Secrets to Improving Your Influence
Bob Ryan, About Purpose, Inc. ©2010
Why is it that in spite of your best efforts, there are some things and some people you can’t seem to change?
Why is it that other things and other people seem so easy to influence?
For years, a model of influence has guided my thoughts, actions and teaching in the area of leadership. It is the Circles of Influence Model.
As you can clearly see, it consists of nested circles. The idea is that the smaller the circle, the easier it is to influence.
“Well,” you might say, “that’s pretty obvious.” But what may not be so obvious are the implications of the model. Yes, it’s easy to see that influencing interpersonally is going to be easier than influencing systemically. But what does that teach us about leadership and the task of influencing at the different levels?
There are three secrets to improving your ability to influence and the model helps make them clear.
1. Always look at yourself first. The easiest influencing target you have is yourself. Be very clear about your own part in a situation.” Know thyself and to thine own self be true.” Make the changes in your own knowledge, skills and attitudes that are necessary for the situation. Don’t demand anything of others or of the system until you have done all you can within yourself to remove obstacles to maturity and change. W. Edwards Deming, a renowned quality guru, always used to say that 90% of every employee problem was the manager. Fix yourself before tinkering with others. A great quote from the bible applies here, “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?” (Matthew 7:3)
2. Never skip a level of influence. The key to effective change management is building a solid base of agreement at each step of the change process before moving on to the next step. The surest way to do that is to share your vision of the future with those closest to you. One-on-one, interpersonal relationships engender trust and create space and time for people to safely examine themselves and their relation to the changes you are trying to influence. Remember, that you cannot change people. You can only create the environment in which they are willing and able to change themselves.
3. Keep your circles tight. Exert influence all the time. Don’t wait until problems arise to try to effect change. Constantly scan yourself, your interpersonal relationships, your teams and departments, and the systemic environment. Learn to recognize trends and evaluate their likely outcomes. Build in feedback loops so that you have a reliable, consistent picture of what is happening and how you, your employees, your customers and your products or services are reacting to it.
A word about the outside circle – Systems. Many people believe it is virtually impossible to change systems. I agree. Just as you cannot change people, you cannot change systems. But if you follow the three secrets above, you will be shaping your environment to respond positively, if not quickly. You will actually be influencing your industry, your profession, your corporation, etc.
If you’d like a more in-depth understanding of leadership by the Circles of Influence, enroll in Leadership – On Purpose. Go to www.aboutpurpose.com for more information or to register.