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Four Words to Change your Life

Bob Ryan, About Purpose, Inc. ©2002

 

I guarantee you will be more effective at ______________ (you fill in the blank). Did you write "selling?" Did you write "managing?" Did you write "relationships?" You put in any word that has to do with other people and I guarantee you will be more effective. How? With just four simple words. "Don't over do it."

 

I want to talk to you about "style." Now, I'm not exactly known for being stylish kind of guy. I admit I buy my clothes off the rack and I'm easy enough on shoes that I wear them for five or more years. I drive a '95 Saturn and the only jewelry I own other than my wedding ring is a hand-me-down with a zircon where the diamond used to be. But I'm not talking about that kind of style.

 

I'm talking about your personality style. Almost everyone has filled out a personality style inventory at some point or another. You fill out a bunch of questions, add some scores in some boxes, and draw in some graphs, and – presto – you've got yourself "typed" with some combination of letters. It isn't rocket science, but it is very accurate and very effective. The two most famous inventories used in the States seem to be the DISC and the Myers-Briggs. These and almost all the others are based on the same vast body of research dating back to the early Greeks.

 

I like the DISC model, so let me just explain how it works. Oversimplifying it a bit, it seems we can all find ourselves somewhere on a continuum from very actively trying to shape the people and environment around us to very passively maintaining what we are dealt. (You know, from "build the better mousetrap," to "if it ain't broke, don't fix it.")

 

At the same time, we can find ourselves somewhere on a continuum from viewing the people and environment around as in a very favorable light, to viewing them in a very unfavorable light. (You know, "the glass is half full or half empty;" "life is a bowl of cherries or it's the pits.")

The result is a matrix like the one above.

 

Our personality styles are described by the point at which our tendencies on the two continua intersect. The upper left quadrant (D), is defined by people who see life as a challenge that needs directing and fixing. The upper right (I), by people who see life as something wonderful that should be actively shared and spread. The lower right (S), by people who see life as a resource worth maintaining and protecting. The lower left (C), by people who see life as an endangered species, needing continuous attention to maintain.

 

Now, I'm coming to the four words. Don't over do it.

 

The very characteristics that describe the strength of your personality – direct, influential, steady, conscientious – when overused – become your weakness. Yes, you heard me. Too much of the good thing you’ve got is what gets in the way of your effectiveness. Don't over do it.

 

Let me give you a personal example. I am a very strong "I." My optimism is infectious and I can talk almost anyone into almost anything. I once influenced a happy, well-adjusted employee to overreach his knowledge and ability and take a job that made him miserable. My confidence in him was based not on fact, but on my enthusiasm and my Pollyanna view of people and situations. Overused, my inspirational style set up the fall for a very good employee.

 

Do you want to improve your sales, your management, your relationships? Learn what your personality style is. Use your strengths. Understand them in relation to those around you and to your situation. And then, Don't over do it.

 

 

About Purpose info@aboutpurpose.com  ·  612-965-2253   ·   Shoreview, MN, USA